Friday, August 6, 2010

Signing up for the CCRM Marathon

As a runner/triathlete I always enjoy researching and thinking about what races I will sign up for in the future. I usually read information about it online or talk to people who have done the race and get the 411. That's the same way I signed up for CCRM. I was so impressed by CCRMs statistics and the success stories that have come out of there. If you are ever researching CCRM, make sure to check out the CCRM board on ivf forums. All of the success stories give me so much hope and make me think that I am in the right place.

When I sign up for a marathon, I am usually nervous, excited, and have a sense of dread (I hate long run training days). I have to honestly say that I felt the same way when I signed up for CCRM. I'm nervous because I don't know how it's all going to unfold and if it's going to work. I'm excited because I really feel like I'm going to get pregnant. I'm also dreading it because we are putting so much into this and if we don't get pregnant, it will be a tough pill to swallow.

During the marathon I really feel an array of feelings. At the beginning I'm excited and ready to go (this is going to be fun). A few miles in I think wow I feel good; I could do this forever. Half way in I think to myself this is ok, but I'm ready for it to be over. By mile 16 I am questioning, why I signed up for it. What kind of idiot runs this far! Make the pain stop! Mile 21 I really don't have any thoughts I just want it to be over and vow that this is my last marathon. Mile 25 I think wow this is really awesome I'm almost done. Then at the finish line I'm so happy that it's done. I'm exhausted, but I have my medal, and I just ran a marathon. I start thinking about the next one I'm going to sign up...

My infertility marathon has been exactly like that. I have felt almost identical emotions during my ivf cycles. The only problem is I have yet to collect a medal (have a baby). Each and every time I get close to the goal, but for some reason it doesn't quite happen. I'm hoping at my CCRM Marathon I have a PR (personal record) and get the most precious prize..... my baby.

No comments:

Post a Comment